{"id":6441,"date":"2015-04-08T21:09:22","date_gmt":"2015-04-09T01:09:22","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/mayahoodblog.com\/?p=6441"},"modified":"2015-04-08T21:11:55","modified_gmt":"2015-04-09T01:11:55","slug":"today-i-failed-as-a-parent","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/mayahoodblog.com\/today-i-failed-as-a-parent\/","title":{"rendered":"Today, I failed as a parent"},"content":{"rendered":"

Today, I failed as a parent.<\/p>\n

It was 7:30 PM and I was losing my mind. It wasn’t the first time this had happened today. I probably lost my cool on three separate occasions. But tonight, I made threats, I yelled and \u00a0I stomped on the floor as I was heading towards my sons’ room. My four-year old son Kyle was crying and he was keeping our two-year old up (they share a room now). After tuck-in, my son “realized” he didn’t’ have socks and he asked me to get some for him (sleep stall tactic #98).\u00a0 I told him to get the socks himself and put them on (knowing it was a stall tactic and having seen him do both of those things before, I didn’t cave to his request).\u00a0 Of course, he demanded and kept on insisting that I do it and when I refused, he started to cry, turned on the lights in his room and I started my tirade.<\/p>\n

Today, I failed as a parent<\/p>\n

My two-year old son Ryan was acting out in his first gymnastics class this morning. He wanted everything to himself or as he calls it “No Kids!” So when he went on the trampoline, he “hugged” or choked and he even bit other kids who also wanted to play on the trampoline. If other kids were using equipment he wanted, he would just push them. Typically it was gentle, but kids are kids and they fall over and cry (as you would expect).\u00a0 I took Ryan aside each and every single time and I told him that we can’t touch \/ hit \/ bite \/ push, etc… It happened so often though I was exhausted by the 100th time. I just wanted to yank him out of there. Of course, it didn’t help that the teachers were reprimanding him as well, making me feel like the worst mother in the world and making me question “why is it only my kid that’s acting this way? Why won’t he just listen to me!” So tonight, when we were getting ready for bed, and Ryan wouldn’t listen to me for the 101 time and instead started rolling around, acting goofy and grabbing for the iPad, I grabbed him hastily and walked quickly towards his room. \u00a0Fuming, I put him in his crib and closed the door and didn’t even turn back to see him pout and\u00a0start to cry while calling for\u00a0his “Ima” (aka Mommy in Hebrew).<\/p>\n

\"Ryan<\/a><\/p>\n

Today, I failed as a parent<\/p>\n

Tonight, I wanted all of my boys in bed and asleep as soon as possible. I’m still awake several times throughout the night feeding our seven month old. I run around all day taking my kids to programs or picking up my oldest for lunch. There are meals that need to be cooked, kitchen to clean and sometimes, just sometimes, I have to sneak a “potty” break. I just really wanted some alone, quiet, ME time and I wanted it sooner than they did.<\/p>\n

Today, I failed as a parent<\/p>\n

I forgot\u00a0that my son is only two. He’s just learning about sharing and playing together with others. He’s just learning about personal space and keeping his hands to himself. My son’s personality is different from others and while he may not be great at some things, he is great at others. He’s extremely verbal for his age and he has a great vocabulary. He has an amazing photographic memory and he adores helping out. He also just loves his two brothers.<\/p>\n

Today, I failed as a parent<\/p>\n

I forgot my son is only four years old and was probably just missing my husband, who was out of the country for work. He probably just wanted one more hug; one more kiss; one more snuggle.\u00a0 It would have only taken me two minutes but instead, I was desperate for alone time. I was craving ME time, and I couldn’t see past it. It wasn’t until he was sobbing in his bed and my two-year old was crying that I finally calmed down and did what I should have done all along.<\/div>\n
<\/div>\n
I \u00a0went to my boys’ room, turned off the lights, ensured my son had his socks on (he did a great job all on his own thank-you very much) and gave him the biggest hug and kiss (while we both finished our ugly cry). I told him that I loved him and that I’m always there for him. \u00a0Then I laid\u00a0in his bed with him for a while while I sang to them both.<\/div>\n

Today, I failed as a parent, but tomorrow, I get to try again.<\/p>\n

\"Finally<\/a>

Finally asleep!<\/p><\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Today, I failed as a parent. It was 7:30 PM and I was losing my mind. It wasn’t the first time this had happened today. I probably lost my cool on three separate occasions. But tonight, I made threats, I yelled and \u00a0I stomped on the floor as I was heading towards my sons’ room. […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":6449,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_genesis_hide_title":false,"_genesis_hide_breadcrumbs":false,"_genesis_hide_singular_image":false,"_genesis_hide_footer_widgets":false,"_genesis_custom_body_class":"","_genesis_custom_post_class":"","_genesis_layout":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"Ever have 1 of those days when you just want to give up on parenting? That was me today. 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