Kyle was in grade 1 when my perfectly sheltered and innocent son came home ‘changed.’ You see, he learned a new word at school that day. A swear word to be exact. While I knew this day would eventually happen, I didn’t realize it would happen when he was just 6 years old. After some prodding and questioning, I learned who taught him this new vocabulary. On one hand, it didn’t shock me. His friend was hyper and loud. Was he a bad kid? Not at all. So why would another 6 year old teach my son this? It’s because his friend has an older brother. Not just a few years older, but about 5 years older. While not ideal, it makes sense why Kyle’s friend knew a few swear words.
So here I was, a mom to a 2, 4 and 6 year old. Knowing that Kyle knew swear words, worried me. After all, he is an older brother too. Would he pass his new found knowledge on to his siblings and would they share it with their kindergarten and nursery school friends?
Well, I tried to prolonge the inevitable. However, as suspected, Ryan and Nathan would come to learn swear words much younger than Kyle learned (like JK / SK early). So we had a conversation with them about how it’s inappropriate to use those words and told them that they could get into a lot of trouble if they use them. So while they are very careful to not use these words at school, I can’t say the same is true at home. I know it’s totally inappropriate, but I can’t help but giggle to myself when I hear one of my boys at home yelling at their brothers, saying “You’re the ‘B’ word!” and “You’re the ‘F’ word!”
Besides swearing, there were so many other scenarios that came along since then where I just couldn’t control the knowledge passing down from the older siblings. One of the saddest moments for me came after Nathan’s obsession with Skye from Paw Patrol and everything pink. While Kyle and Ryan were pretty good at first at not saying things like “pink is a girl’s colour”, eventually they pointed out that Skye is a girl, so Nathan shouldn’t like her. Just like that, Nathan’s love affair with pink also faded away.
No pink for my boys, except for Pink Shirt Day
The other big difference between Kyle as a toddler and his brothers was the shows they watch on TV. While Kyle went through all of the typical ‘TV show phases’ of Mickey Mouse Club, Thomas the train, Barney, and so on…. Ryan and Nathan mostly skipped those shows and pretty much went straight from Bubble Guppies and Paw Patrol to Pokemon and Teen Titans. In fact, they even enjoy watching older kid shows like Fuller House and School of Rock. Did I mention that they were only 3 & 5 at the time they started?
A little part of me is sad that they lost their innocence so early. Of course, I would never change the fact that they have an older sibling. It’s probably the best gift in the world. My hope is that the older brothers will come to the defense and support of their younger brothers as quickly as they taught them how to swear. A parent can only hope, right?
If your kids have an older sibling, what were some of the ‘inappropriate’ things that they learned too early?
Ahhh I see these things in my future!!! Although after an enlightening chat with my midwife we have severely cut back the tv for all of us. Right now the girls definitely are like two extra moms because of the big age gap, but I do worry when they fight that he will pick up things for sure. So nice that you two have such a close relationship!
Well let’s see… my girls are 16 (almost 17) & 20 years old. I had the same experiences of certain stages being skipped. Tv shows is an excellent example. No baby shows… straight to Zack & Cody, Hannah Montana & an obsession of High School Musical of course, are a few big ones.
Now that they are older I find Jennifer has tried “older girl partying” far younger than her sister ever did! Did not turn out well, (🤮) so that stage ended very quickly!! Not that it won’t happen again, I am very aware of the younger sibling being “older” because they have an older sibling. Jessica is much better friends with her younger sister now, and has been a great role model academically & in her pursuit of a brilliant future. I think it’s important to realize that younger siblings will grow up faster than the oldest. The oldest is where we learn & experience “firsts” although sometimes we may not even know it. Treasure every moment, every experience be it good or bad, because at the end of the day, week, month or years you look back and realize it’s all special❤️
Wow,your boys are growing up so fast!
My son is 6, he knows the swear words (my husbands trucker mouth) but he knows not to say them. And he never has. Which is great because my youngest daughter is 20 months and just starting to pick up on lots of words. So far so good.
Ahhh, hide me from all of this. Mine are just babies.
My children are three years apart but they argue all the time but if someone did and said something to the other then they are in super protective mode.