We have all heard about parents having a favourite kid. True or false, it’s definitely a parenting topic that gets a lot of air time. Dare a parent admit that they have a favourite though as they risk being ridiculed and judged by others or worse yet, they can scar their kids for life. But if we’re honest & open here (heck, that’s what my blog is for, right?), I have a favorite! But it changes daily 😉 I guess the truth is, whether or not parents have a favourite child, they have the ability to conceal their feelings.
The same is not true about kids. Case in point, this happened with my own son a few weeks ago! As the boys were shooting golf balls in the lake as they often do, one of my kids started swinging the golf club around haphazardly. I asked him to stop because he might hit me followed up with “and then who would be your mother?” So my one son (who will not be named to protect his identity), without skipping a beat said “it’s okay, daddy will find a new mom!”
Poof… Just like that I’m completely replaceable. When I asked him if he would be okay with me finding a new dad, he said he can’t imagine living without his dad. Good answer, but back to me!! Why am I so easily replaceable? It honestly brought me to tears.
Obviously he’s Just a kid and he doesn’t understand what he’s saying but I would be lying if I said that it didn’t hurt.
I get it… John does everything he likes – plays baseball, can drive the cottage boat, and plays hockey (which is the reason my son said that he prefers John over me). I guess in his eyes I’m “just” the chauffeur, cook, grocery shopper, and organizer of every thing else in the house. While my husband and I try to juggle the housework equally and I can play a mean baseball game, it’s not how my son sees it.
Upon further inquiry (because I obviously couldn’t let it go), he did say that he’s only 15% sure I am replaceable (phew!!). If anything, his comments have made me focus on how I can be a better role model in his life. Someone that he respects and that he can’t live without (at least for his formative years).
Whether or not I’m his favourite, I know there’s still a place for me in his heart, even if it’s just temporary. The other night, he asked me to come and lie down with him in bed until he fell asleep. He put his arm around me and told me he loves me. At that moment, that was everything I needed to hear him to say!